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Consistency

Published Thursday, January 26, 2006 by rivka | E-mail this post

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Such a big word. What is consistency, exactly (in the context I'm talking about)?
  1. Reliability or uniformity of successive results or events... (from here)

Reliabilty ... successive results/events. Hmmm.

In D/d language? When the same offense crops up repeatedly, you can count on it resulting in punishment. Notice I didn't say the same punishment. Because, sometimes, repeat offenses call for a more severe consequence.

Anyway. Consistency is so incredibly important. Still considering myself kind of new to actually being involved in a D/d relationship, I can attest to this. But, even knowing all that, there are times when I balk at forms of consistency...

For instance: when I truly forget. My brain just doesn't want to comprehend being in trouble for something I didn't mean to do. However, after all is said and done, the fact that he stayed strong and firm always fulfills my true need. I become grateful and thankful that I can depend on him to keep me in check consistantly. I remember that I asked for it, and that this is what I really want.

Although I sometimes hesitate, I've made a committment with myself not to fight any consequence he deems necessary. So far, I've yet to be sorry for that.

Unfortunately, I read about people all the time who fight, control, and twist punishments into what they think they want, in that split moment, while it's all happening. Then, after making it into something it wasn't meant to be, they feel guilty and regret ever doing so. Sometimes even becoming angry that their manipulative behavior was heeded. Which, in turn, confuses the punisher to wit's end.

The way I see it, if you want consistency - you have to allow consistency. Fantasies, a lot of times, consist of the sub being overpowered and punished mercilessly by their Dom... Reality is much different. Especially in modern times. I believe that, eventually, such a relationship gets to the point where fight or not, the punisher knows what's got to happen. However, it takes time, experience, and clear communication to get to that point.

Truth be told, I know it's completely in my power how my punishment goes at this point. I know enough about us both that if I do this certain thing, he won't do that. However, I try to take that knowledge humbly and suppress the panicky-oh-my-gosh-he's-about-to-beat-me-with-that-thing-MUST-STOP-IT! thoughts.

That's what you have to do though - promise yourself you won't interfere (if possible) with the punishment itself.

Trust.

-All that goes out the window if the punishment is insane or unsafe. OF COURSE.


~~~

A good sub, in all simplicity, actually submits to her Dom's will.

~~~

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About me

  • Intro (with up-to-date edits)

    • In Dreams

    "And in dreams I am free
    falling into what is not;
    what will be what is.

    It's this intense hatred
    for reality twisted
    in an obsession of hope

    Defy the stagnant
    life that speaks only
    what can be but wills not.

    God's grace,
    not my self fear
    of what I think I cannot be."

    -rivka

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